My 4 year old son, Hyrum (previously known as Brenden from LWB), has been home with us for 11 months. Recently he was having a hard time because his sister did not want to play what he was playing. Hyrum laid on the floor and rolled around crying, which is what he does when he can’t console himself. I could tell that this time he just needed some validation and to be reminded that he was loved, so I picked him up and sat at the computer. Knowing that pictures of children help calm him down, I opened the LWB Community blog titled Trauma’s Lasting Effects. I read a short bit when Hyrum, with real intensity, tried to get my attention. He pointed to the first picture of the little boy in the crib with metal bars and said with sadness, “He need Mama.”
You see, Hyrum was at one time this little boy in the same kind of crib with the same metal bars. This innocent child knew the pain of not having a Mama to hold him when he was sad. He knew the emptiness of not having a Mama to wipe his tears and clean his scrapes. Hyrum is very aware that the little boy in the picture has no one to care for him when he is sick or rock him to sleep when he is afraid to sleep because he may miss something, those things that he had missed out on for too long. He knows the longing for a Mama and a Baba. A Mama and Baba to carry him on their shoulders and swing him in the air as they hold his hands walking down the street. I don’t think that Hyrum would have felt this 11 months ago when he was beginning to learn what a Mother and Father are. After such a short period of time, he recognizes what he missed and how much he loves being part of a family.
Not too long ago we had to drop off Hyrum’s sister, Bria, at a birthday party. Bria and Hyrum came home from China at the same time and have become each other’s support. I took Bria up to the door of her friend’s house, and Hyrum sat in the seat looking out the window with worry on his face. When I came back to the car, he wanted to know why Bria was staying. He was very concerned because this was the first time that either he or Bria had not been with a member of the family. He was worried that we would not come back and get her. I took him in my arms and reminded him that Bria was his sister and we would come back. I told him that we are a family and will always be together. He then said in his sweet little voice “I love it, family.” What a testament of the blessing a family is in all of our lives.
I am writing this to say that LWB’s work is making a difference. We appreciate the constant reminders that there are many children out there that need us. It is easy to get caught up in the busy aspects of life and try to push our responsibility to care for others aside. We make excuses that we are doing our part and that that has to be enough, but it really never is. LWB’s work is invaluable. I just wanted everyone to know that if it were not for what you do, our sweet Hyrum would probably still be sitting in his crib in China. ~Deanne Walker
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